“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.” -Neil Gaiman
That's quite a long quote isn't it? Anyways so it appears that the blizzard of '10 is pretty much over. At least that's what the weather report says, no more snow accumulation after 3am, but with heavy winds still going on. I must say I enjoyed this week and despised it at the same time. The good parts of this week: got my homework done, got a little workout shoveling snow, relaxed (or hibernated whatever you want to call it), got through some of my tv shows, and was able to do some thinking. The bad part of this week: was able to do some thinking. Thinking for me is a double-edged sword. While it gives me a chance to self-reflect, which we learned in elementary school (well I did at least) is a good thing to do as a means of self-improvement. Who couldn't do with a little self-improvement every now and then? As for me, I've come to accept that it's pointless for me to set these little goals or things I should start doing that I know I won't be able to do. Call it poor self-control or just being stubborn and holding onto the old, but I've realized 90% of the things that I tell myself to do I end up sticking with for about a week and then stopping. So why set myself up for failure? Reasonable goals are more likely to succeed than ones where I've set myself up to fail. I've also accepted the things I can't change. Sure I can try to be what I feel to be the perfect person, but everyone has their faults even if they don't think so. There are just some things I know I won't be able to change, but those things are what make me me....right?
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